Gift to a Mother
Editor's note: This former Seton student was assigned in college to write a letter to a former high school teacher. Since, she was homeschooled, she wrote to her mother.
Dear Mum:You were my only teacher in high school, but I could not have asked for a better teacher. You taught me more than you could ever know, more than I could ever ask for, more than anyone will ever fully begin to appreciate. By home schooling me, you changed the very core of my being from a lost and bewildered little girl into the strong woman I am proud to be. It was through your example and growth that I have become the greatest thing I could ever hope for and the only thing I have ever wanted to be – I have become me.
I remember my reaction to your telling me you were home schooling me and [my brother and sisters]. I remember the tears and the shouting. I remember that I fought you tooth and nail with every idea and immaturity that accompanies a girl of thirteen. I simply could not see how removing me from mainstream society was good for me in any way. I envisioned myself locked in my bedroom for the rest of my life, and my somehow becoming a ridiculous nerd of epic proportions. I saw only my isolation and loneliness, and I saw myself unable to ever regain any semblance of normalcy.
It makes me laugh now to think about just how ridiculous I actually was. Your brave decision to home school all of us changed my life forever. You removed us from the grips of public opinion, of peer pressure, and of high school drama. I remember initially wanting to be a part of the drama instead of just looking at it from the very distant outside, and then I remember shaking my head as I watched my friends slowly go downhill. I remember my best friend telling me she had lost her virginity at fifteen. I remember hearing that one of my good friends in middle school had gone to high school to deal drugs and landed in prison. I can still remember one of my old teachers telling me that the Valedictorian of my middle school class got pregnant and moved to California to get married. I remember wondering what happened to them, and I remember thanking God that I was not part of it.
Without distractions of peers and appearance and the "drama" I had wanted so badly, I was able to truly become the person that I was meant to be, instead of a carbon copy of a typical high school student. You gave me the gift of individuality and a freedom from peer pressure. I was able to grow and learn in an environment without judgment or pressure. I could be whom I wanted and what I was as I changed extensively and learned more about the world around me.
Perhaps the most important aspect of your teaching was the morals and virtues and characteristics that you instilled in me and in each one of us. You taught us our religion better than ten years of parochial school had, discussed higher principles than had ever been discussed, and instilled ethics that we had never considered. You, as our mother, know us better than anyone and were able to gear your teaching to us individually according to our strengths and weaknesses, and you were able to touch something inside of each one of us because of it. You were able to go deeper into each one of our subjects with us, discuss each point, and pull out more information than just what was given on the surface.
Little by little, I began to appreciate everything that you had done for us, the sacrifice that you had made. I remember going to bed and seeing the dining room light on until wee hours of the morning as you sat up to make up lesson plans and correct papers. You were incessantly working with me and [my brother and sisters] until you knew that we learned the materials. You proofread papers, corrected assignments, made us re-do things that were not up to your expectations. You made all of your children better students and academically hard workers.
However, more importantly, I was able to learn more about you. I had loved you my whole life as my mother, but it was not really until we began home schooling that you became my best friend. I remember coming to you almost every day with a new tidbit of information that I had learned in a particular subject, and we would talk about it, analyze it, offer each other different points of view. I learned more about your opinions on various subjects, and it was then I began to fully realize just how alike we are. I learned that I was able to talk to you about almost anything, and you were always there when I needed you. Even now as I am in college and so far from home, I know I can still call you no matter what time of day or night; you are always there to patiently listen and offer advice, never judging and never scolding, but always honest and pointed.
As a child and into my schooling years, as a strict parent, you taught me to walk, to talk, to love, to tell the truth, to be nice, to be patient. In high school, as my teacher, you taught me Algebra, Biology, Shakespeare, English, Logic. As my mother, you taught me ethics, principles, morality, religion. As my best friend, you taught me how to deal with people when they bother me, how to handle the opposite sex, how to have fun. Perhaps no one can ever truly understand how much you have taught me, but to say that you taught me how to be me through your love and your example is probably the simplest explanation. You gave me the gift of myself and the gift of the greatest friend anyone could ask for. And for those gifts I will perhaps never truly be able to find the words to thank you enough.
Content taken from the December 2005 Seton Home Study School Newsletter.